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volume 2 サンプル




音声 (MP3)録音時間:1時間30分
PDF文書 156ページ
英文単語数: 15027語


Marriage Jokes(結婚のジョーク)31個

Family Jokes (家族のジョーク)34個

Blonde Jokes (ブロンド・ジョーク)30個

Work Jokes (仕事のジョーク)30個

​音声サンプル (VOLUME 2)

00:00 / 05:38

テキストサンプル (VOLUME 2)


A young woman was taking an afternoon nap. After she woke up, she told her husband, “I just dreamed that you gave me a pearl necklace for Valentine’s day. What do you think it means?”


"You’ll know tonight,” he said. 


That evening, the man came home with a small package and gave it to his wife. Delighted, she opened it, only to find a book titled, The Meaning of Dreams.



nap 昼寝

titled ~ ~と言うタイトルの










A loving couple was celebrating their 25th wedding anniversary, privately, at home with a couple of bottles of champagne. A bit tipsy, and feeling very intimate, the husband turned to his wife and asked, "Tell me truthfully, have you ever been unfaithful to me?"


"Well," she replied, "since you ask, to tell you the truth I have been unfaithful on three occasions."


"What? How could you?"


"Let me tell you about it," she said. "The first time was back when we were first married. You needed open heart surgery and we didn't have the money, so I went to bed with the surgeon and got him to operate for free."


"Gee! That was noble of you. And, besides, I guess I should be grateful. But, tell me, what about the second time?"


"Do you remember that VP of Sales position you desperately wanted, and they were going to pass you over for someone else? Well, I went to bed with the President and the Vice President and they gave you the job."


"Hell, I think I could have done it on my own. But, then again, I guess I should be grateful. And so, what about the third time?"


"Do you remember two years ago when you wanted to become President of the Baseball Team, and you were short of 53 votes...?"



tipsy ほろ酔いの

intimate 親密な

unfaithful 浮気をする、不貞な;不実な

“to tell you the truth” 「正直に言うと」

occasion (ある特定のことが起きた)時;機会

open heart surgery 心臓切開手術

surgeon 外科医

noble 立派な、高潔な、称賛に値する ■ここでは夫の手術代の代わりに自分を犠牲にした行為について言っている。

grateful 感謝する、恩を感じる

VP of Sales 営業部長 VP=Vice President ■アメリカの多くの企業において、vice presidentは部署のトップに立つ役職を指す。つまり、日本の組織の「部長」に当たる。その場合、この例のように“Vice President of ~”と部署の名称が伴う。

pass A over for B  Aを候補からはずしてBをとる

“Hell!” [スラング]「そんな!」「へん!」「クソ!」 ■驚きや苛立ち等を表す。

short of~ ~が不足している 














A little girl asked her mother, “How did the human race appear?”


The mother answered, “God made Adam and Eve and they had children, and so all mankind was made.”


Two days later the girl asked her father the same question.


The father answered, “Many years ago there were monkeys from which the human race evolved.”


The confused girl returned to her mother and said, “Mom, how is it possible that you told me the human race was created by God, and Dad said they developed from monkeys?”


The mother answered, “Well, dear, it’s very simple. I told you about my side of the family and your father told you about his.”



evolve 進化する

my side of the family 私の側の親族、私の家系














Little Johnny is in his closet when he hears a noise. His mom comes in and starts having sex with someone other than his dad. He hears a door slam and his mother says, “Oh no, my husband is home! Quick! Hide in the closet.”


The man gets in the closet and little Johnny says, “Dark in here, isn’t it?”

The man is startled but then calms down. “Yes, it is.”

“Do you want to buy my baseball glove?”


“I could go to my dad.”

“Fine. How much?”

“200 dollars.”


This happens again later in the week.

“Dark in here isn’t it?” he says.

“Yes, yes... it is.”

“Do you want to buy my baseball bat?”

“How much?”

“300 dollars.”


A few days later his dad wants to play ball with him and tells him to go get his glove and bat.


“I can’t. I sold them to my friends.”

“For how much?”

“500 dollars.”

“That is way too much. I am taking you to church right now for a confession.”


They get to church and little Johnny gets in the booth.


“Dark in here, isn’t it?” he says.

The reverend says, “Don’t start that shit again. You’re in MY closet now.”



slam バタンと閉まる

(be) startled 驚いて、ギクッとして、唖然として

play ball 野球をする

go get his glove and bat [口語]go and get … という文の and を省略。

way too much あまりに多すぎる・高すぎる ■wayはtooを強調する役目。

confession (司祭に対して行なう)告解、懺悔

booth ブース ■ここでは告解するための小さな個室

reverend ~師 ■元来はReverent Jones(ジョーンズ師)といったようにタイトルとして使われる。

“start that shit” 「例のふざけた真似を始める」 ■shit=[スラング]糞。shitはthing の代わりに使うことができる。非常にくだけた粗野な言い方。司祭の言葉であるところが、これまた笑いのポイント。































A husband and wife were driving through Louisiana. As they approached Natchitoches, they started arguing about the pronunciation of the town. They argued back and forth, then they stopped for lunch. 


At the counter, the husband asked the blonde server, "Before we order, could you please settle an argument for us? Would you please pronounce where we are, very slowly?" 


She leaned over the counter and said, "Burr-gerrr-Kiing."



Natchitoches ナカトッシュ ■ルイジアナ州中部にある町。町名は、その土地に住んでいた先住民のNatchitoches Indianに由来する。

back and forth 堂々めぐりして;行ったり来たりして

server ウェイター、ウェイトレス ■waiter, waitressという呼び方は今でも健在だが、politically correctであろうとする場合、性的区別のない(=gender-neutral )server という語を使う人が多い。

settle an argument 議論を収める・解決する










A blonde sees a flier on a bulletin board that reads, "Cruise -- Only $5." She goes to the address on the flier and hands the receptionist $5. The receptionist nods to a burly man reading a newspaper. He walks over to the blonde and knocks her unconscious.


The blonde wakes up tied to a log floating down a river. To her right, she sees one of her blonde friends. "Do you think they're going to serve food on this trip?" she asks.


Her friend replies, "They didn't last year."



flier チラシ、ビラ、広告

bulletin board 掲示板

read~ [自動詞]~と書いてある

nod うなずく

burly (人が)たくましい、がっしりした

knock someone unconscious 人を殴って気絶させる ■unconscious=気絶した、意識不明の;知らず知らずの

log 丸太










 Two engineers are riding bicycles when one says, “Where’d you get such a great bike?” 


The second engineer replies, “Well, yesterday I was on my way home when this beautiful girl rode in front of me, tossed the bike and her clothes to the ground and declared, ‘Take what you want!’” 


The first engineer nods in approval, “Good choice - the clothes probably wouldn’t have fit.”



“Where’d you get”  Where did you get の発音通りのスペリングの一つ。

toss 放り投げる

declare 宣言する、言明する、公表する ■その女性の態度がきっぱり、堂々としていたので、単なる個人的会話なのにdeclareという大げさな言葉を使っている。

nod in approval 賛意を表してうなずく










A realty salesperson had just closed his first deal, only to discover that the piece of land he had sold was completely under water. "That customer's going to come back here pretty mad," he said to the boss. "Should I give him his money back?" 


"Money back?" roared the boss. "What kind of salesman are you? Get out there and sell him a houseboat." 



realty salesperson 不動産販売員

close a deal 取引をまとめる、契約を結ぶ

roar 怒鳴る;(猛獣が)吠える

houseboat ハウスボート








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